Went to the chiropractor today as my right arm has been going numb and weak from the shoulder down to the ring finger and pinkie. He took X-rays, came back, and asked how I'd gotten the huge trauma to my neck.
What? I didn't know I'd had any.
He slapped the X-ray up on the board. Turns out my neck is somewhat broken between C5 and C6. Pretty incredible picture, as even a sight-impaired toddler would notice the difference in my spine from all the other straight spots.
I've spent the hours since trying to recall an injury of that magnitude. The doctor suggested a skiing accident. I've never skied. I told him I'd literally been dropped on my head when I was a baby, but when I checked with Mom later, she said the woman who dropped me felt worse than I did about it.
I even called my ex-husband to see if he could think of something I couldn't. He confirmed that the time the man kicked me in the throat during a Tae Kwondo match wasn't hard enough to do such damage.
Might need to call my BFF, as we were cheerleaders together, but I'm pretty sure I would have remembered falling out of a pyramid onto my head ...
A broken neck. Seems like a good excuse I can use to get out of things from now on. "Sorry, can't help move your piano." Point to neck. "Sorry, can't bag my own groceries." Point to neck. "Sorry, can't do laundry anymore." Point to ...
Any great fiction ideas for what happened to me? I need a really good story, but it has to have the reason why I don't remember built in!
As a young child, you heard bobble-head tryouts were held in the cafeteria, you raced to sign up. The tension and pressure to preform, intense, tightened the muscles in your back. As you arrived, tall men in dark suits ushered children into a long line against a brick wall. No talking was allowed.
ReplyDeleteSoon, you name was called. But when asked to bobble your head, the muscles spasmed. Angry, they yelled at you until tears formed. You bobbled, despite your rock hard muscles. It cracked your neck.
No one remembers that day. Perhaps the men in dark suits and sunglasses were from the government. Or maybe a large business firm. Either way, no one from that cafeteria was the same, ever again.
I know, your alternate ego in a another time warp was a fighter of good and met their match, receiving the crippling kick to the head. Now you get to finish the end of the story.
ReplyDeleteBeing the fascinating woman you are, the aliens from Herungeaneingddgh 7 decided they needed a closer encounter.
ReplyDeleteIn the disguise of Antonio Banderas, one of them seduced you. Fainting from the aliens breath (because try as they might, they could not disguise THAT), you fell into his arms.
At last, they had the woman they had traveled 5300000000 light-years to see! Holding you close, he ran like a Hrannen out of the undercrust (their version of Bat out of ----) and accidentally hit your neck and head on the door jam of their ship, thus causing a traumatic neck injury.
After studying what makes you so amazing, and without any memory of the incident (because of the head bump), they returned you a little worse for wear. But their mission for knowledge of the most fascinating woman in the world was a huge success!
I'm so glad to have friends with imaginations! :) Thanks for the theories.
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